The publication of my memoir has given me the opportunity to flaunt my shame.
Why in the world would anyone flaunt shame? Because a spotlight is a powerful weapon upon the darkness.
Author Brené Brown on shame: “You know, I always say that shame drives two primary tapes: not good enough, and who do you think you are? So to me, it’s a very formidable emotion. Its survival is based on us not talking about it, so it’s done everything it can do to make it unspeakable.”
Speaking of the unspeakable takes courage, and more than one reviewer of my memoir used that word — courage — to describe the telling of my messy, uncomfortable story. And the courage comes from admitting mistakes. Brown, the author of “The Gifts of Imperfection” and “Daring Greatly,” appeared recently on Krista Tippet’s “On Being” (hear the complete interview here) and she addresses that courage borne of vulnerability:
“Think of the last time you did something that you thought was really brave or the last time you saw someone do something really brave. You know, I think, without question, and I can tell you as a researcher — 11,000 pieces of data — I cannot find a single example of courage, moral courage, spiritual courage, leadership courage, relational courage, I cannot find a single example of courage in my research that was not born completely of vulnerability.”
How novel, to think of vulnerability as a strength instead of a frailty.
“There’s something incredibly brave and daring about showing up.”
~ Brené Brown